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It’s not very interesting, apart from the things I mentioned at the beginning. Here, Ty Dolla $ign at least acts like he knows what the lyrics mean, and Nicki is just doing her thing. That’s the wrong era of Drake people to steal from! Yet, this is exactly what a Jason Derulo song has been since “Talk Dirty” became a massive hit – a collection of weird sounds that are stacked on top of each other to no end, with occasional guests from other people that only add to the silliness. That has to be the worst organ preset I’ve ever heard. Hannah Jocelyn: That has to be the lamest line reading of “freaky freaky gyal” I’ve ever heard. Katie Gill: Man, remember when a Jason Derulo song didn’t AUTOMATICALLY mean it would be a repellent piece of shit with terrible lyrics and an awful bridge? Even Nicki Minaj realizes how awful this is, as shown by her sleepwalking through her rap. ALSO REMEMBER TO DO THE DISHES BEFORE YOU LEAVE FOR WORK. PARTIALLY BECAUSE ITS A MESSY, OVERCOOKED VERSION OF “NANA” BY TREY SONGZ BUT HE TRIED IT, HE REALLY DID. YOU WILL HEAR THIS MESSAGE MOMENTS LATER, AFTER HAVING DIGESTED THE SONG FOR A FEW MINUTES, AND YOU STILL WON’T BELIEVE IT.
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Micha Cavaseno: *calls my own phone’s voicemail* JASON DERULO IS DOING A FAUX-DANCEHALL “SWIMMING POOL”-QUOTING POP SONG ABOUT SWALLOWING, IT BANGS, AND NICKI MINAJ IS THE WORST PART OF IT. It’s Nicki Minaj Day! This first song may have a been a bit much for us to uh…